When I receive a product to review, my first instinct is to look at it from every angle, read all the promotional materials and try and get a “feel” for the product overall. With non-mechanical items, this can be a little challenging, but not impossible. Masque was one of these challenges.
Masque is a single-use oral sex “strip” in one of four flavors – chocolate, strawberry, mango and watermelon.
Each individual strip comes in a small foil package that opens by peeling apart the corner.
Roughly the size and thickness of a Listerine breath strip, it’s placed on the tongue just prior to performing fellatio to “mask” the taste of penis to theoretically make oral sex more pleasant to the taste buds.
I was surprised initially by the package text, as it specifies fellatio and not cunnilingus – sorry ladies! It does contain glycerin, an ingredient that can cause sensitivities and yeast infections in some female users, so that might be a good thing when all’s said and done. (By the by, for those intrepid readers out there, I also wondered wtf Pullulan was. Apparently, it’s a fungus derivative used in most breath freshener strips. Yum?)
I wish I could say that this product was nifty. Yes, the concept is interesting (though I’d recommend a long talk with your partner about bedroom desires far before I’d fork over a flavored film to cover their taste) and the execution should work, but the taste just…isn’t quite there. I tried chocolate for myself and it tasted like a combination of burnt coffee grinds and menthol, which is odd because there’s no menthol in it. It filled my whole mouth with the taste and I will say this – I wouldn’t have been able to tell the difference between my partner’s penis and a bedpost at that point. It is VERY persistent – and I mean VERY – two toothbrushings and a vigorous rinse with mouthwash after the fact and it was still going pretty strong. In the name of science ToySir “stripped up” and popped a tab of strawberry onto his tongue moments before getting down to business. He sat up and pawed at his tongue almost immediately with a squinched-up nose – while I wasn’t fond of the taste, he genuinely disliked it. On my end, my lady parts felt…well…odd, and there was that menthol-y feeling again, only this time it was all up in my Georgia O Keefe. We rinsed off, brushed our teeth and declared Masque a less-than-successful experiment.
It bears mentioning that my partner and I are all about each other’s genitals, and bringing these little guys into the bedroom probably made about as much logical sense as non-smoking me chowing down on some nicorette gum. I wanted to give Masque a fair shake, though, and I can say that it successfully covers any hope you had of tasting your partner’s wang. My issue lies mainly on the taste used to fill the void – I feel like it misses the mark and that it’s less pleasant than the taste of penis. If you’re giving it a go, my advice would be to try a corner or a half first to see how it works with your particular taste buds.
Sorry, Masque – looks like partying incognito just doesn’t do it for this ToyChick.
Masque strips are available in three packs for $9.95 at YourMasque.com.