Review: Isi Dildo from Babes-n-Horny.com

Silicone is where it’s at, as any toy-lovin gal knows, but until now our options have been curiously flat in hue. Sure, we could opt for exotic colors like purple, or fall for pearlescent sheens – or heck, even have objects embedded in our bedside tools, but overall it was a color x for dildo y sort of formula.

UNTIL NOW. (dramatic music)

Isi Dildo from Babes-N-Horny.com

This, dear readers, is the Isi dildo. It’s rounded, friendly and probably one of the most visibly striking dils in my collection to date. Brag pics to my twitter friends of my Babes-N-Horny.com collection drew compliments firmly in the favor of this playfully striped dildo, and I got more than a few queries as to where I’d picked it up. It’s fun, fresh and reflects the lighter side of sexual play – plus, it’s non-representational for toy lovers that like less wang-specific insertables.

Measuring a petite but serviceable 5″ in length (4.5″ insertable), the Isi dildo ranges from about 1″ to 1.15″ in diameter. The base is flared, making it great for harness use – Babes-N-Horny.com has several that fit the bill – and safe anal play. The rounded tip slides in easily and doesn’t poke or prod uncomfortably.

Now here’s the interesting thing I noticed about the Isi dildo, and Babes-N-Horny.com’s silicone in general – it’s soft. Not outer-layer-of-dual-density kind of soft silicone, but closer to a texture I’d associate with foam rubber. I can “squish” it easily with two fingers, and bend the already lightly-angled shaft with one, as you can see here:

Isi Dildo from Babes-N-Horny.comIsi Dildo from Babes-N-Horny.com

This differently textured silicone means that heavy thrusting might be a bit awkward, but on the other hand, beginner’s anal play is going to be extremely comfortable. The entire dildo has this uniform “squishiness” with the exception of the pink pearlescent band. This unusual component has a firmness I’d associate more with typical silicone – more rubber-like than foam-rubber-like. It may help provide the curve seen in the shaft, but I can’t be sure:

Isi Dildo from Babes-N-Horny.com

All in all, this is a very fun dildo that I’d highly recommend for anyone interested in trying anal. Its relative softness, slight curve, rounded tip and flared base are all but custom-made for the task and won’t disappoint. Water-based lube works well with it, and it cleans up very quickly with soap and water.

The Isi Dildo can be purchased via Babes-N-Horny.com for  £45.00 (Roughly $71.00 USD)

Curious about other Babes-N-Horny toys? I have three other reviews forthcoming for the line, so stay tuned!

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UPDATE: Weird Sex Toys O The Week – “Foot Masturbators” Edition

I get a disturbing amount of hits for a foot toy post I made about 3 years ago. I know foot fetishists tend to be a passionate bunch, but I’m surprised I continue to get “play” from what I consider a pretty old post. That being said, I like to give my readers what they’re looking for! I’m sprucing up my old post and adding a couple of new toys for all my “sole” brothers (and sisters!) out there – this way, everyone can see at a glance the foot-shaped sex toys available on the market.

The Jesse’s Senso Foot Masturbator – $44.09 on Amazon

Doc Johnson Belladonna’s Foot Soldiers – $44.22 on Amazon

Penthouse® Pet Collection Justine Joli CyberSkin® Foot Job Stroker – $51.64 on Amazon

Pipedreams Basix Rubber Works Little Piggies – $35.90 on Amazon – Solid foot replicas.

Femme Foot Fatale Flesh – $40.99 on Amazon – A female foot shaped butt plug with textured graduation.

I’m sad to report that as of 3/19/2012, the Sifeet Pussyfoot (from the now-defunct Pioneer-Products.com), Kaylani’s Foot Fetish (from California Exotics) and the Serenity’s Little Piggies (from Pipedreams) all look to be discontinued or no longer available. The four items above were the only foot-shaped sex toys I could round up.

Do you know of or manufacturer other foot-shaped sex toys? Please comment below and I’ll be happy to add them!

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Weird Sex Toys O The Week (WSOTW) – Exhibitionist Edition

I have never personally used a glory hole. Taken out of context, it sounds like a delightful french pastry that commemorates liberation of some sort. It is not.

So when I got hailed on twitter by someone that has solved a problem that I never knew existed, I knew I had to share the good(?) news with you, dear readers. Much like blow job bibs, the portable glory hole seems to be gilding the lily a bit, but one can’t deny the sheer head-tilting simplicity of it. In a nut(ha!)shell, these self-proclaimed “Novelty Glory Holes” are pieces of what looks to be heavy duty vinyl or chloroplast (essentially the plastic version of corrugated cardboard, think election lawn signs) printed with the usual suspects in the glory hole location lineup. Jail, a bathroom, a brick wall and….a barn? Whether strung up as a flap in an open doorway or stood up like a fuckable piece of advertising from the movie theater, the time-honored tradition of tab A into slot B takes over from there.

Now for me, the part that piqued my curiosity was the T-shirts. Okay, a lot of “adult” companies have T-shirts – usually they allude to the product in a tongue-in-cheek manner. My hubby rocks my “Working Stiff” shirt from GearEssentials all the time, and occasionally I’ll wear the less-subtle “I Would Fuck Me” tee Xpeeps so kindly sent my way a bit ago. But these….these…they proudly proclaim the full website address right along the bottom, near as I can tell. In addition, the Glory Hole Store should be commended for helping this long-lost pair of unattractive fraternal twins find each other. My money’s on MS paint if the question of how they discovered one another pops up.

Well HELLO Dolly.

Want a portable gloryhole of your very own? It’ll only set you back $89.95, and can be found – as the twins so helpfully remind us – over at GloryHoleStore.com.

 

 

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Weird Sex Toys Of The Week – There Are No Words Edition

Ladies and gentlemen;

While I strive to provide off-color humor and tongue-in-cheek commentary on this blog, I seldom wander over the proverbial edge. While I’m certainly not family-friendly by a longshot, I try and keep a modicum of classiness to this joint to ensure I don’t startle off skittish readers. There comes a time in every sex toy blogger’s life, though, that something so jaw-droppingly out of the ordinary skates across the radar that I’m compelled to mindlessly share it with you. *

It’s a shit dildo. There is no other way to say it. No, those of you in the back still clinging with panic to the notion that maybe I meant a poorly-constructed sex toy. I mean an ACTUAL shit dildo.

I won’t post the picture for those with sensitive stomachs, but you can view this…erm…very special toy here. Shit Dildo Link (Holy FUCK this is soooo NSFW)

…at…least…it’s…….silicone?

*kinda like that video tape in The Ring.

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Weird Sex Toys O’ The Week: “This Really Exists?” Edition

Hello, Dear Readers.

I make no mistake that the vast majority of visitors to my humble blog come for WTF-ishness and not my stellar writing skillz. With that in mind, I’m going to make a very concentrated effort to keep my WSTOTW feature actually weekly, and not…less so…as it’s been previously. I would like to add the caveat to this feature that an item’s spotlight here doesn’t necessarily mean it’s a bad/unsexy item, only that it’s a little left of normal for some sex toy dabblers. It’s my aim to provoke interest and discussion – certain flavored items have spawned discussions about sexual hygiene stances, for instance, while dildo shapes have often had the blogosphere buzzing about anatomical reality versus perceptions.

That being said, I present you with an array of goodies that are likely to make some heads tilt:

Cockattoo Penis Tattoo Sleeves

1.) The Cockattoo : A temporary tattoo for….your penis. Sure, they’re no Dapper Dicks costumes, or Tuxedo Condoms, or even Happenis Hats, but they’re definitely unusual. Guys, I was with you right up until the Marriage Proposal one.  I never in my life imagined that I’d have to turn to my partner and inform him that he was not allowed to propose via a cock tattoo.  Granted, the odd photoshopping of a penis-beak on a black palm cockatoo (I was raised in a bird family, long story) and the pseudo lounge-music on the site were also a bit off-putting, as was the glow-in-the-dark ring toss sleeve option, but I imagine somewhere there’s a guy that loves humiliation and is chomping at the (cock-shaped, tattooed) bit to get at these suckers.

Divine Interventions Bible Sex Toy

2.) Divine Interventions’ Bible Thumper ($27, Black or Silver). You’ve heard of well-placed bibles stopping bullets, but have you ever heard of a good book containing one? This sex toy is essentially a silicone sleeve for your favorite bullet, and measures a diminutive 2.75 inches tall by  2 inches wide. For blasphemy lovers, this one is hard to beat (har!), especially with a little Holy Water Lube.

Cthulu Dildo

3.) Mythos Art Dildo ($175) – Finally, your love for H.P. Lovecraft and the elder gods can be your LOVE for H.P. Lovecraft and the elder gods. Necronomicox, of recent fame for their realistic Zombie Dildos, continues to appeal to the loins of the sci-fi crowds.

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Like a Phoenix of Phalluses, I return!

A phoenix rising over two dildos.
Hello, dear readers.

Much has happened in the last (mumblemumble) since I updated.

1.) For those not in the know, I was partnered to a guy for the last seven years, the last three of those an engagement – with a sparkly ring and everything. Well, in a horrendous cliche (really, I’m embarrassed at how unremarkable it is) he started spending more and more time at the gym, and less and less time at home between work and working out. Turns out “the gym” was, at least toward the end, a euphemism for “vagina” – spoiler alert: not mine – and he abruptly split with me for good for the gym girl on our seven year anniversary. Classy to the bitter end, ladies and gents. Emphasis on bitter.

2.) Someone, in the interim, bought my former dot com. I can’t say I’m surprised because I’m awesome. Still, kinda sad. Your regularly scheduled dildo-based snark has been shifted to ToyChickBlog.com, so update your bookmarks if ya’d be so kind?

3.) I’m still kinda getting adjusted to being XXX-ish again, so bear with me if my posts are slightly less sexy for a time. Also, please pretend I lived under a sex-toy-repellant bubble for the last year and clue me in to anything major I missed. I’ll be researching on my own, but it’s always good to get missives from the front lines.

4.) I have a new man and it’s freakin fantastic. Seriously. My god, the sex. ❤

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Advice: How To Buy A Sex Toy

AT A STORE

Some people buy a sex toy on impulse when shopping at a physical store, but don’t feel pressured to do this. I tell my friends – small things, like condoms and lube, are great to buy because the price really doesn’t vary a lot from online stores, and you’re likely to use them immediately and often. However, on larger items like rabbit vibrators or large masturbators (essentially any sex toy over $40 in the store), you owe it to yourself to comparison shop.

You can do this by looking on the box, just above the barcode. There will be a “sku” there (NOT the numerical barcode, which is usually about 16 numbers underneath the barcode itself) which you’ll want to copy down discreetly. Some newer cell phones, like the G1, have scanner apps that can do this for you automatically. Be polite and quick about doing this, and don’t give any reason for the nice counter folks to think you’re taking cell pics, which can be a big no-no in these places. Once you’re home with this code (if you’d written it down and not scanned it), toss it into google, minus any hyphens, and include the name of the toy if you’re having trouble turning it up.

You’d be surprised at the markup on some items. A rabbit that lists for $60 online might sell for twice that in the store! I don’t begrudge shop owners, natch, they’re just trying to make a profit and keep food on the table. This is why I advocate always purchasing condoms and lubes from the if you can – it’s a steady income that is easy to translate into repeat business as the customer’s supplies run low.

There are four major toy manufacturers – California Exotics, Doc Johnson, Pipedreams, and Topco – together these guys put out most toys, I’d estimate 80% or more currently on the market. All four of these companies have their collections on their respective sites for you to browse through. If something catches your eye, just type the name or code into froogle to comparison shop.

If the toy is by Topco, the code will have a format like  #1234-5

If the toy is by Doc Johnson, the code will have a format like # DJ1234-56

If the toy is by California Exotic, the code will have a format like # SE-1234-56-0

If the toy is by Pipedreams, the code will have a format like # PD1234-56

AT A HOME PARTY

It’s easy to feel like you have to buy something to be polite, which is one of the reasons why home parties for sex toys and other items like candles, cookware, jewelery, do so well. Again, same ideas apply – if you want to grab a lube or something small, by all means. Again, though, it’s better to research larger purchases before plunking down the cash. Also, almost all of the “party brand” specific lubes, lotions, oils, arousal creams, etc are repackaged major brands, so don’t think you can’t get another tingly lotion or flavored powder if you don’t grab it right then. Naturally, it’s nice to purchase something smaller from the host, but you can usually find  that large kit or expensive toy for a lot less elsewhere.

I know some people will boo and hiss at me for dissing home parties, but the truth of the thing is that the companies are still making a healthy profit off of these hostesses, perhaps more than they should. I have nothing against profit, but I have a bone to pick with any ‘job’ that makes you purchase anything to start working for them. My take is that if parties really are profitable, the company should furnish demo collections for hostesses, and rely on the program to recruit people, not the hostesses.

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Weird Sex Toys O’ The Week – Wang Bibs & Labia Makeup Edition

It’s been awhile since I’ve done one of these, but there are a few WTF-worthy inventions that alert readers have pointed me to. Apparently, there is a market for festooning one’s favorite (or personal) wang with all manner of attachments that either ensure the testicles don’t get dribbled on (the horror) or, much like truck nuts, announce one’s dubious taste in self-expression in a…unique…fashion. Need a scented cock-mounted napkin that “masks body odor” after or during oral sex? We’ve got that covered too. Are your labia faded from years of wear? No worries – we’ll get that georgia o’ keefe back to a matte finish caribbean salmon in no time, courtesy of an unidentified powder that has been on TV and a website told me is totally safe!

I present: CockBib, via CockBib.com , The Lickie Dickie, via LickieDickie.com, and Labia Dye, via MyNewPinkButton.com

…enjoy?

-TTC

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Weird Sex Toys O’ The Week: Interesting But Odd Idea Edition

A sort of mixed bag this time around, this Weird Sex Toys O’ The Week was intended to be an “in development” version, but I could only find two things in development worth writing about! That being said, here are three sex toys – two in development and one on the market – that might take stimulation places you’ve never seen it go before.

1.) The “Talk2Me” Vibrator – This is an incredibly interesting concept – a rabbit vibrator that purrs in tune with your favorite songs’ bass in the shaft and treble in the clitoral attachment – but is backed by a strange company that seems to have neither the will, funds, or momentum to get it to market. The site’s been literally the same for the last three years, and any attempt to contact the makers is met with disinterested staff that seem to dodge questions like a nervous politician.  If you know more about it, do feel free to educate me because I’m terribly curious when it will be available. Calls and emails generally are not returned, in my experience.

2.) The Y Dildo – Originally pointed out on twitter by the fabulousness that is Megan Andelloux, this unusual silicone cousin of a dowsing rod purports to stimulate both the G-Spot and the Perineal Sponge when the toy is inserted..i.e. both prongs up the girlybits at once.  Check the site here!

3.) The Touche Vibrating Ice Dildo – This is actually on the market and purchaseable. Think of it as those tupperware make-your-own popsicle molds from the 80’s paired up with a vibrating bullet. (edit, 12/8/09 – I was searching in vain for an ice vibrator review that I knew AAG had written…would you believe there are TWO ice vibrators? I also present the Icegasm for your WSTOTW approval)

Enjoy the oddness! More to come soon 🙂

-TTC

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