Weird Sex Toys O’ The Week – The Floating World Edition

on September 13, 2009

One of my first days trying to re-locate back home saw me rushing headlong back into toychickiness,  in a familiar place playing trusty sidekick to Ms. Vera of For Your Nymphomation.  Along with the singularly lovely Ms. Wendy Blackheart (who – and you heard it here first – is a shameless cheeto fetishist) – I served as a super sexy, and still very tired, booth bunny.

While there was a bit of oddity, it was more of the fun, quirky variety that makes you go “Huh. Nice.” and kinda grin to yourself. I am by no means a painslut…hell, if I could get pillows reclassified as a flogging device, I would…I can still appreciate a nicely rendered tool. (Stop giggling. I know you’re giggling.)

My friend M. from Wolf Princess Designs debued a really neat cheeseburger gag – a rubber life size cheeseburger squeaky-toy (minus the squeak) mounted sideways on a vegan strap for semi-ironic and animal-friendly kinky fun. I regret that I have no picture of this delightful and original design, but the cell phone enforcement was hardcore…and not in the fun way!


Canes4Pain had  very cool “beach canes” –  particularly painful looking rattan sticks covered in sharp broken seashells from Sanibel beach in the proprietor’s native Flordia. In a thoughtful finishing touch, the handle is wrapped in rough nautical rope that can also be employed as the sadistic wielder sees fit. Covered in a special material that ensures all the shell bits stay put, the canes are proudly proclaimed to “easily cut skin”. Yeowch!

…and this last one, while it wasn’t at The Floating World, rounds out what I always try and make at least a trio of strange items. I’ve seen this idea in santa, in soldiers, in firefighters, and in policemen – and now proudly (?) continuing the tradition of wind up masturbation novelty toys, our very own commander in chief…


In a funny side note, I took some “artsy” shots of vintage arcade games on a trip to the shore awhile ago. There was an old brass “love meter”, the plaque of which is now my blog header. Basically, you would grip an egg-shaped handle with a trigger on the front of it as hard as you can to measure your “love strength”. While I’m sure this was a quaint and perfectly acceptable notion back in the 1920’s or so when the games first debuted…it only took one look at the handle to send the perverted mind of yours truly into fits of mental snickers:


P.S. – Okay, so I’m totally late to the party on this one, but if you haven’t heard, Tantus made a cool sparkly dildo called the Vamp that totally has nothing to do with Twilight. Nope. No Sir.


One response to “Weird Sex Toys O’ The Week – The Floating World Edition

  1. How have I never heard of the cheeseburger strap-on?

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